apparently my brain has a pattern...

And all this time I thought it looked like a ball of gray worms. Or cauliflower.

My Brain's Pattern

My mind is a creative hotbed of artistic talent. I'm always making pictures in my mind, especially when I'm bored. I am easily inspired to think colorful, interesting thoughts. And although it may be hard to express these thoughts, it won't always be.

What Pattern Is Your Brain?

doesn't anyone in africa or antarctica love me?

All right. Time to issue a blog challenge. According to my sitemeter, I've had visitors from every continent other than Africa and Antarctica. So, let's all make use of our seven degrees of separation and find someone on these fine continents to visit me.

Africa shouldn't be that tough. I just KNOW that one of you knows someone who knows someone who knows someone over there. Antarctica, on the other hand, will be a bit more difficult. I don't even know if they have internet access there. I just jumped right in and posted this without googling that point.

Why should any of you care? Simple: fame (very limited) and fortune (also very limited). Whoever manages to arrange a visit from Africa will receive mention on this very blog (exciting shit, eh?) and an authentic trinket from Africa, of which I have several and will give you your choice.

Now, the grand arranger of an Antarctic visit will receive a mighty fine beakman (THIS one, not that science guy) T-shirt, the design of which is in process. The winner will be pleased to know that actually wearing the damn thing is NOT REQUIRED.

So email this post around and please mention it on your own, far-finer blog.

And now... a totally unrelated quote:

"No one who ever bought a drill wanted a drill. They wanted a hole."

just what type of movements did it detect?

Ahhh, good ol' American ingenuity. Yes, this device was actually used. In case you can't read the placard:

"Dog Doo" Transmitter

Dropped along the Ho Chi Minh Trail by air, this device transmitted a warning when supply movements occurred during the night. The signals were monitored by a variety of agencies, including the CIA.

wedgies: another high-brow post

I'm not sure if this is supposed to be an erotic site or a humor site. That's a thinly veiled way of saying I don't know if I'm supposed to be turned on or amused. Either way, a round of applause for the creator. Now THAT'S goooooood internet!

Leather pants. 'nuff said.

Ebay is far more than a marketplace. It is a never-ending fountain of entertainment. For your review, the following listing.

DK Leather Pants

The comments on this item are more than a little amusing.

This could just have easily been the parachute pants I had in the mid 80's. Never wore them. Not ONCE. I don't know how I even ended up with them. Come to think of it, I don't know whatever happened to them, either. I can only hope they went in the garbage and didn't get donated to the Goodwill. Passing that horror on to another owner would be oh-too-tragic.

Gee. Who'd have guessed with THAT photo?

Oooooo..... a 2-photo post. You must all feel so special.

Well, I bet Captain Kirk would not have taken this well.

George Takei, best known as Sulu from the original Star Trek, has publicly announced he is gay in Frontier, a bi-weekly (oh, it just HAD to be a BI-weekly, didn't it?) Los Angeles magazine covering the gay and lesbian scene.

Be honest, now. Didn't you always suspect that possibility?

But, hey, kudos to Star Trek. That's one more notch in the ol' diversity belt. Did you realize Star Trek featured the first white/black interracial kiss? Not to mention all the interspecies action Kirk always got. That man's mouth must have been like an intergalactic bacteria farm. I would imagine the Federation kept him in isolation for a good while everytime he came back to port. I'm sure they heard about the happenings pertaining to the captain's log.

alright, you can shut up now! ;)

OK, so I've been outta the loop lately. I'm posting again right now.

Are ya happy, twinkie? What about you, zoddy?

I know nothing else at the moment.

Oh, yeah. Visit http://www.reliefdonations.org and pick a charity (or two, or three or a bunch) to donate to. Our hurricane situation here in North America doesn't seem nearly so bad when compared to the nightmare in Asian earthquake areas. So help out the relief organizations.

the power of 6

I love 6. It's wonderful. All thing work as they should through 6.

"What the hell is he talking about?"

Power level 6 on my microwave and burner setting 6 on my stove.

Everything comes out perfect on six: grilled cheese, sausage, frozen gyro's, quesadillas, bacon, eggs... you name it.

Oh, if only everything could be mastered so simply and succinctly.

6: Learn it. Live it. Love it.

natalie's diggin' it...

OK, so I found Jolly Green Julie's blog via Twinkie's blog today, and since Julie had such a lovely post about Jessica Simpson, I thought I'd share this with you all in that same spirit. I left a comment some time ago about this pic on Twinkie's blog, but why should she get all the blog traffic?

See, even movie stars like Natalie Portman get undie-creep.


Can I give you a hand with that, Natalie? ;)

yowch! (but they deserve it)

Only from South Africa could (and should) such a device emerge:

The anti-rape female condom, known commercially as Rapex.

Nope. Not a joke.

What is it, exactly? Well, check out the link for details, but essentially it's a portable pussy porcupine, to put it in indelicate alliteration terms. It's a sheath which contains painful barbs which implant themselves into any invading... um, er... member. The theory is this will cause MUCH pain (I don't think that theory will need proving), giving the victim time to escape. Also, it apparently requires surgical removal, but causes no long-term damage. If you ask me, long-term damage should be guaranteed, rather than avoided.

What deplorable social condition have precipitated such a device's invention? Why, only the world's highest highest reported rape rate per capita: about 1 in 840. Don't forget that "capita" includes males, so if you rule them out, it's really about 1 in 420 or so. That's only the REPORTED rapes. Experts estimate the actual rate could be as much as NINE TIMES HIGHER, which could theoretically put the rate at 1 in 46. Crikey. What a wonderful world.

bon voyage, gilligan...

Well, another piece of TV history is off to the vaults. Actor Bob Denver, of Gilligan's Island fame, passed away Friday, September 2.

So now it's time for useless trivia!

Q: What was Gilligan's full name on the series?
A: Willie Gilligan

Q: What was the Skipper's full name on the series?
A: Jonas Grumby

Q: What was the show's original pilot's title?
A: Gilligan's Island: Marooned

Ha! I used up some of your gray matter, and you'll never get it back!